Completed As, but just so worried about the results.

As for my plan B? I really don't know. At first I thought X was quite possible, but now it doesn't seem to be so. I really don't know where to turn to if plan A does not work out (which is very likely). I don't really have the luxury to choose right, so I should just accept whatever I'm offered. 

Found jobs, but yet to start any. No income, and just being a burden to the family.

Signed up for driving classes. Yet another financial burden but I really want to learn it now.

Nothing just seems to be going well right, or maybe I should be patient. When I start work, things will get better. I'm actually quite excited to start work, yes for the income, but more importantly the experience. If it's a meaningless job, I'd feel equally or even more useless. 

At first, I thought I'd enjoy just resting at home everyday after the end of As, but I was so wrong. That was me during post-Os, but not now anymore. I want to do meaningful things, be it volunteer work, or pick up a new skill etc. I wish I can make a difference to somebody's life, and be less of a burden to my family. (sigh)

I think I've been thinking too much to the extent that I can't get proper rest every night. Even if I fall asleep, the nightmares creep in, and then I wake up again. I really wish I can make this stop and have control over my own mind but I'm really just so mentally tired from every single thing. 

Whatever it is, I'll leave my life in God's hands, for He already planned the next step for me.